So you didn’t achieve your goal. What now?
We’ve already broken down goal setting as a healthy coping mechanism on our blog, so we know that goals can be a great way for us to improve and motivate ourselves towards self growth. Using the SMART method (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely) helps you set achievable, healthy goals. And within that process of setting SMART goals, you’re able to evaluate the relevance of your goals in your own life & give yourself concrete steps to achieve them!
Which all sounds great! Like a road map to success.
But what about when, no matter the planning or the preparation you take, you still don’t meet your goal?
Did you fail? Did the method fail? Is there even a point to trying again? Why even bother setting goals at all if you still aren’t going to meet them no matter what method you use? (Do these questions pop into your head when you don’t meet a goal you wanted to?)
How do you deal with not achieving your goal?
Do you:
- Assume you’ll never be able to reach it and stop trying?
- Decide that setting goals is pointless because you “never meet them anyway”?
- Think about what got in the way of you meeting your goal?
- Try to find an alternative route to meeting your goal?
- Decide to follow the same method and try again?
For many of us, when we don’t meet a goal, we can get instantly discouraged. We feel that it’s pointless to try again because if we were good enough, smart enough, hardworking enough, etc. we would have met it the first time around. But this type of thinking gets us stuck in our own heads and prevents us from taking any real strides toward our own personal growth.
Having a plan in place for what to do if you don’t meet your goals can help relieve some of the pressure you feel when working toward them. Then, not meeting them won’t feel like a failure but an accepted part of the process–and you’ll be more motivated and more likely to reformulate and try again.
So what should you do when you don’t achieve your goals?
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Do an autopsy:
What derailed your projected plan? Why weren’t you able to meet your goal? Was it an unexpected incident that you couldn’t plan for? Did you not follow through on parts of the plan you made to meet the goal? What were the signs along the way that you might not meet your goal? Really look back at the whole process, see where you succeeded and where you fell short. Make a note of priorities for the next time you try, things you learned from this attempt, and things that are going to require a little more effort.
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Investigate what it is you’re really working toward with achieving your goal:
It’s possible you didn’t meet your goal because you just simply didn’t really care about meeting it. Why did you set the goal in the first place? Is it something you actually really want to achieve, or was it based on what you think you should want to achieve? If your motivations aren’t stemming from yourself, or your own true desire to grow, it will be hard to keep that momentum going. Reevaluate if this goal is worth your time and energy, or if you should shift gears. Find something you really want to work toward, and start again.
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Get some feedback:
Do you have a friend, a coworker, a family member, etc. who has met the goal you’re working towards? Ask them about their experience! What did they do when they hit roadblocks, how did they handle setbacks, what did the process look like for them. Open yourself up to honest feedback. Tell them what you learned about yourself and your goal in steps one and two, ask them for their thoughts or advice. Ask questions like “what do you think about this goal? Is it achievable? Is there something I’m not thinking of?”
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Remind yourself what you learned:
You didn’t fail–you just didn’t meet the goal. That’s okay, it happens! Instead of focusing on the “I failed” idea, get out a piece of paper and a pencil and write a list of things you learned from the process. Even if you didn’t meet the goal in its entirety, you gained practice, experience, and new knowledge you didn’t have when you started. Think back to where you started and make note of the progress you made. Remind yourself that without this effort, you wouldn’t have gained that experience, and that in itself is a success!
“We think, mistakenly, that success is the result of the amount of time we put in at work, instead of the quality of time we put in.” -Arianna Huffington
