DBT Therapy and the Balance of Things
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (or DBT Therapy) focuses on finding the balance in things – simply put, we work towards ending our cycle of working in extremes. This includes our ability of being too task oriented!
As residents of New York City we are no strangers to throwing ourselves into work, completing our tasks, and moving onto the next task. Just like multitasking – this ability is seen as a positive in our society. You feel ambitious and goal-oriented.
The downside is that you may also feel overwhelmed, unfulfilled, never satisfied, like you’re in autopilot…
On the opposite end of the spectrum, we have been in the present and allowing ourselves to be unmindful of future tasks, or worries in order for us to enjoy our day to day lives and those things that would bring us joy! You’re in the present, curious, and ready to enjoy the moment as is.
The downside is that you may feel unmotivated, lacking direction, not completing necessary tasks or responsibilities…
There are setbacks to only operating in one mind at one time…
While doing mind can ruminate on our inability to complete a task, or reach a goal as a complete failure – If we are too far into being mind, we might forget to challenge ourselves and plan for the future.
When we activate our wise mind – we are combining our ability to do and to be.
We want to be able to complete tasks, reach our goals and be able to be present, and aware of the activities that we are participating in – not just the feeling of completion or “failure;” which is dictated by doing mind. & at the same time, we want to be able to live our lives, be curious and accepting of our emotions, and be in the present moment.
The synthesis of Doing and Being Mind is – Letting go of having to achieve goals while throwing yourself into working towards those goals.
This includes:
- Radical Acceptance of the moment
- Nonjudgmentalness and Self-Compassion
- Setting goals, and identifying our values and priorities.
Doing Mind puts us too far in the future to be appreciative and happy about where we are currently and Being mind puts us too far in the present to be aware of and discriminating for our future.
I feel that the following quote helps to explain the downside to this cycle of extreme of doing and being mind.
“I feel like I am constantly worrying about the next part of my life, without realizing that I’m right in the middle of what I used to look forward to.” -Anonymous
